The Baillie Bugle

If I go to the gym early in the morning before work (to go for a climb or a swim or a run) I usually need a hearty breakfast when I reach my desk.
The canteen has a decent breakfast bar - cereals, continental breakfast, quite an exotic fruit salad selection and a cooked breakfast.
The cooked breakfast is good - it's not too greasy and it's very tasty. But the sausages are - as they say back home - mingin'. They don't look healthy, they're mishapen and oddly coloured, and in fact they've kind of put me off sausages all together for the time being.
So I've been eating veggie sausages instead.

So I'm sitting here eating my two veggie sausage, hash brown and a sea of baked beans. Quite happily munching away.
When I'm down to one sausage and half a sea of beans I notice something quite disturbing.
The veggie sausage looks like a jobby. Very like a jobby.
So much so that I don't think I can eat it...
Which is a shame - because I know it doesn't taste like poo...